To : ALL From : Flipper Subj : time to continue... Flipper slowly became aware of his surroundings and opened his eyes. He noticed that he was in a hospital bed, and a life monitor quietly beeped beside him. "It was all a dream..." thought Flipper wonderously. "I'm still at the Oceanarium hospital... I must have been delirious. The deathstar, the pleasure craft, PeeWee Pinrut... I dreamt it all!" He lay back and relaxed a bit, pleased. He was about to allow himself to drift off to sleep when a slightly familiar figure wandered past his door, mumbling about how unfair life really was sometimes. Flipper slowly got up, ignoring slight pains in his flukes, and headed for the hall, intent on catching up with the figure. * * * Carolina woke up to the sound of two nurses conversing over her. "Yes, and did you see the way he jumped when the doctor used that heart thingy on him?" "Oh, that was wild, but then you have to admit it was hilarious when Mrs. Growstroke reacted to the novocillian and spent two hours breakdancing on the walls." "Yeah!" There was a giggle. "What about this one?" "Oh," slight disappointment, "she was in a traffic accident. Hit by a cab, no serious injuries. Not sure where she's from, she wasn't carrying any ID, and neither was her comapnion." Carolina sat up, slowly. "Where am I?" she asked. "I'm thirsty." The nurses turned to her, revealing their greenish, fish-shaped heads. Carolina felt sudden hunger pangs, but decided to ignore them. "Just rest, now, you'll be all right with a little rest." One nurse left, presumably to get some water. Carolina hoped so, anyway. "You were in a small accident, and your shuttlecraft was destroyed. But if you tell us where you're from, we can arrange a ride home for you and your friend. You can probably go this afternoon!" the other nurse returned, and handed Carolina a large jug. Carolina sniffed the fluid, and then drank, happy to find it was indeed water. "From?" she repeated, putting down the jug. "I'm from Earth. Can you really get me and Flipper home?" "Earth?" repeated both nurses. They spoke quietly to each other for a moment. "I don't think we can get you a ride to Earth," stated one. They both turned and left Carolina to herself. To : All From : Phantom Subj : This wandering mind o' mine. Flipper left his room and began shuffling down the hallway, as fast as his stiff, pained flukes could shuffle him. The object of his annemic rush of speed was ambling ahead of him, letting out a mutter of curses and self-pity as a trail to be followed. Flipper tried to shuffle quicker, but it was just too painful to keep up. Apparently he still hadn't completely recovered from whatever accident put him in this godforsaken place. Seeing that he was going to lose his quarry, he sucked in as much air as he could, and let out a huge bellow.... "PINRUT!!!!!" At least, that's what it was supposed to be. Unfortunately Flipper hadn't had anything to drink for a while, so it kind of came out as a "PHRPTH!!", which did get the distant figure's attention, but also resulted in many disgusted looks from other hospital patients who's beliefs in the beautiful and serene dolphin were shot down by the hideous fart they had just heard this one emit. The distant figure slowly turned, still muttering incoherently about it not ever being his turn to rule the world, and about pet hamsters, when suddenly he saw Flipper. He slowly stopped muttering, and he seemed to scrutinize Flipper quite closely, a curious expression crossing his face. Flipper, seeing it was Pinrut, raised a fluke and say "Glack! Urgle thpthn fraglle..." Flipper lowered his fluke and looked slightly embarrassed, realizing that he was kind of making a fool out of himself. At least, so it would seem by the fact that the hallway was suddenly full of patients pointing and squinting at him, saying things like "What's he doing", and "Gee, I didn't no dolphins could fart". Flipper's attention, however was on Pinrut, who slowly started to inch forward towards Flipper, with a strange expression on his face. The only thing is, about three seconds after starting to move forward, he stopped and began to start looking about wildly, as if searching to locate something. Flipper, confused, started looking around too, but could see nothing. But them, on the fringe of his dolphin hearing, he began hearing a sound... An ordinary sound, but all the same.... A patient rounded the corner, his leg amputated. In place of it was an artificial one, but at the end of it, instead of having a shoe, there was a suction cup... Onward he claim, in slow motion, towards the now-cowering Pinrut. Clomp. PLOP! Clomp. PLOP!! Clomp. PLOP!!!! Clomp. PLOP!!!!!!!!!! Withe very suction cupped step, the strength of the plop intensified, bringing hideous memories back to boil in Pinrut's mind. "No.... No.... NOOOOO!!!! Leave me alone, infernal plopping beast!!!" Pinrut leaped forward and ripped the plunger/artificial leg off of the startled man, after which a wild melee insued between Pinrut and the plunger as he tried to destroy it. Flipper watched with a touch of sadness, as the Pinrut, now with the plunger firmly suctioned onto his face, rolled over and over on the floor of the hallway. His mood was brightened somewhat, however, as one of the patients watching the scene turned to the invalid beside him and said, "You know, maybe that dolphin isn't so bad after all." To : Snarglefoog, My Friend From : Rancid Instigator Subj : Airplanes taste better in the shade. Kramodac had the time of his life. His new ship sailed across the universe, a money-making venture, completely self-contained, highly-profitable, and... well... "Boss?" asked a female voice in soft, dulcet tones, "I seem to have bruised myself. Would you examine my bruise for me?" ============== Steiner, on the other hand, wasn't so thrilled. He was crammed into a ship, filled to the brim with a psychopathic woman named after a tree, a serial killer who claimed to be her sister, and a smelly beast, shaped like an octopus, that when ever strapped into a chair, still managed to make irritating plopping noises. (Stir when simmering, add high-tech weapons to taste). The ship, however, was highly responsive. He dodged through meteor swarms, he attacked fleets of insanely huge ships, he landed in strange ports, and he was dragged through several too many department stores. =============== Kramodac adjusted his belt, smiled in a fashion that indicated that he made his peace with the universe, and walked back towards the control room. The chief pilot, Melissa, was at the helm, flying the ship in a competant fashion. "Melissa?" asked Kramodac, lowering his form into the co-pilot's chair, "I'd like to fly this thing again." "Aw, come on, boss, just another hour?" she replied in a pseudo-whining tone. "If you don't let me," he grumbled, "I'll be forced to punish you." Her squeal of delight was the second-last thing he expected. The first-last thing he expected was for her to wrestle him for the controls. All of a sudden, a planet beneath them began to look veeeery large... ================ Sequoia was enjoying herself, in a weird fashion. She was beside the only man she respected, she was well-armed, well-fed, and well-shopped. Her sister didn't seem to be overly interested in Steiner, which made her day, and that weird beast, the one that plopped, it wasn't interested in her, which pleased her all the more. One of these days, Steiner would succumb to her charms. She knew it. ================ "Aaaaaaaaah!" screamed Kramodac, as the atmosphere buffeted the Naughty Nymph. The ship was losing altitude all too quickly, and all of a sudden, all he wanted was a nice drink at a quiet bar, waaay back on Terra. "Your going to pay for this, Melissa!" he bellowed. She cooed in delight and began wrestling for the controls anew, completely oblivious to the onrushing land. ================ Janne was less than thrilled. There, before her, was a man who'd make a perfect match for her talents, and it was all thrown away, dashed before her like waves onto rocks. She'd spent her whole life searching for a man who was her equal in combat, and so far, no man had come close. She slew them all with her bastard sword, and yet, they still kept on coming. Things were made worse by that dreadful Plopper creature, which seemed to have taken a liking to her, and would use any opportunity it could find to sneak up behind her and plant moist, slimy kisses on her face. Each and every time that loathsome beast did it, she was poignantly reminded of her man, the only man who could be hers... PeeWee Pinrut. It was clear to her that only a man with that much might could have hewn himself such a mighty empire in such a brief period of time. Her mission: to find PeeWee, fight him, then marry him. ==================== CRUTCH! A ship the size of a city block ploughed into a hospital the size of a small city, kicking up an overwhelmingly large cloud of dust. When the dust settled, a very attractive woman could be seen advancing towards a nervously retreating male. "Punish me, please!" could be heard wafting over the moans of the construction workers who'd just finished building the latest wing of the hospital, just to have it collapse seconds before completion. Several women, most of them scantily clad, staggered out of the ship, wiping their eyes from fatigue and surprise. The moans of the construction workers abruptly halted, and silence prevailed... for several seconds, anyway. "Aaaaaauugh!" A scream penetrated the air, and one slim, matte-black-clad form was seen racing over the rubble, being chased by a whip-wielding woman. To : Lily From : Rancid Instigator Subj : This one's sorta for you. Several nice, young men in clean white coats put Pinrut into a funny jacket that made him hug himself. They had shot him full of lithium and were preparing to take him away, when a faint noise in the distance caught their attention. It sounded like a man, screaming in terror. They paused for a moment. Flipper looked up from where he was slumped on the floor, certain that he'd heard the sound somewhere before. The sound grew steadily louder in volume. Punctuating the sound was the steady drumbeat of a pair of running feet. One of the men, scratching his head, turned about and looked down the hallway. The screaming increased in volume some more, then jumped up sharply when a gurney smashed a pair of doors open. "AAAAAAAAAAAH!" screamed a small, thirtys-ish man, his face pale with fright. He jumped over the gurney, kicked off a wall to perform a blazingly fast ninety-degree turn, and overran the doctor in his extreme haste. An attractive woman peered around the corner, dressed in black... nothings, with a whip in her hand. "Kramodac?" she asked, "I don't know, but I'm beginning to get the impression that you don't want to punish me." Flipper bolted upright. He recognized that woman from somewhere. The rest of the doctors hastily ran over to tend to their fallen comrade, who had size 9 footprints up his chest, and Pinrut, no longer being held down, made a casual, leisurely break for it, cooly jogging down the hall in his straitjacket. "Boss?" asked Melissa, thorougly confused. ========================================== "Yeah, so whaddaya wanna do now?" asked Steiner, boredom clouding his voice. "Does it matter?" replied Janne. She seemed terminally depressed. Plopper tried to edge closer, but his seat restraints held him in. "Let's go back home," muttered Steiner, cranking the ship over. "There's a few people I'd like to deal with." With a sound of a thousand men saying "Foop"... no, wait, wrong story. Uhh... well, they left. Enough said. ========================================== The engineering team of the Naughty Nymph hastily trooped out into the open, resplendent in their comfortable coveralls, with carefully slit seams that revealed just a hint of their femininity; just enough to entice, as they fell to work repairing the ship yet again. Bo and her new mate, Vlarg-the-smelly-gray-ape, stood outside and carefully monitored the contruction workers who would each spend two months of pay for an hour of unique pleasure. They smiled at each other, as only a huge, powerful woman and a huge, smelly, powerful ape-like creature who-could-drink-sulphuric-acid could. They made a great pair of bouncers together. =========================================== "That Kramodac guy," grumbled Melissa, lifting Flipper onto his tail by his flukes, "is utterly insane. He's nuts." She brushed dust off his chest. "Really, boss, if you don't mind me still calling you that, things were so much better when we had you around." She looked around, and spotting the gurney that Kramodac had used to break open some doors, towed it back to Flipper. "Get on this and I'll cover you up," she mumbled sotto voce. "Really, I've got to get you out of this dreadful place. Me and the girls can take much better care of you." To : Melissa From : Flipper Subj : It's not that I don't appreciate it... Flipper looked at Melissa, and then at the cart. He leaned back against the wall, mostly in exhaustion, and shook his head slowly. "I've got to find Carolina," he sighed. He really didn't want to back to the Nymph. On the other hand, he realized that he might be able to use it to get back home. "You don't need Carolina," cooed Melissa, brushing up against Flipper. "I'm SURE we can service you much better than she can..." Flipper cringed back slightly, but being against a wall made that difficult. He suddenly and unexplicably began to wonder where Steiner was. * * * Carolina was in another hallway, having left her bed when she heard the horrendus crash the Nymph made when it slammed into the hospital. She felt somewhat better to be on the move, and she began the think that wherever the action was, Flipper was probably nearby, trying to escape. She sighed audibly, and continued moving slowly down the hall. * * * Meanwhile, Mr. Pinrut had found an office, and was using a small scalpel to slowly work away at the heavy material of the straightjacket. "Try to take ME away, will they? ME, who used to almost be ruler of the UNIVERSE! Well, they can't get away with that!" At the memory of his sudden fall from power, Mr. Pinrut suddenly dropped the scalpel, and sat down against the wall in a fit of depression. He felt an overwhelming desire to grow vegetables. * * * Flipper stood near the Naughty Nymph, trying to look powerful and domineering. Bo threw him the occasional suspicious look, but said nothing more than a curt greeting when Melissa brought him back. Flipper had convinced Melissa that he needed Carolina around, and a small force of women from the Nymph had gone into the hospital to locate her. Flipper was supervising the completion of repairs to the ship, in preparation for a take-off to Earth. After he got there, he wasn't really sure what he was going do. All he cared was that he was going home. To : Teardrops Make Things Salty From : Flipper Subj : oops... put the weird lines here... A brief, light commotion came from the hall behind Flipper, and he turned to see what was going on. The group of females sent to look for Carolina were returning, escorting her somewhat rudely, pushing her occasionally with their GUNs. Carolina was protesting weakly, trying to convince them that she could indeed walk on her own, without being pushed. Flipper was shocked. "Stop that!" he yelled. The women came to attention. "Put those guns away! What are you trying to do?" One of the women came forward. "Sorry, sir, we thought you wanted her captured." Flipper shook his head. "Never mind now," he sighed. "Go back to work on the ship..." The women returned to the ship, where they removed their combat uniforms and donned the seductive coveralls. The hospital workmen, those that hadn't already put down a month's salary or two, merely gawked. Flipper turned back to Carolina, who sighed, and sat down against a wall. "Are you all right?" asked Flipper, standing over her. She smiled, and nodded. Flipper sat down beside her, and held her fin with his own. He looked back over at the Naughty Nymph, almost repaired and ready to leave. "They do good work," he commented absently, gazing absently at the ship. "I wish the past would leave us alone," lamented Carolina in return. Flipper turned to her, question in his eyes. "Everything comes back on us," she continued. "Since I found you at the Oceanarium, it's been one big replay after another." "I don't know what you mean," replied Flipper. "I can't think of anything that happened since you came back which had happened before." In truth, Flipper didn't want to think much of many events, but he did anyway. Carolina turned, to face him directly. "In symbolism," she explained. "The insanity, the overrun, the murders and the release, then more captures and escapes! It's all aimed to stop us from being together!" Flipper shook his head, and held her close to him. He stroked the back of her neck with his flipper as he replied. "Nonsense," he stated. "It's just been bad luck. You're being paranoid. We're going home soon, and then everything will be all right." She pushed back slightly, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. Flipper was surprised, but hid it. He'd never seen her be anything be strong. "Are you sure?" she demanded. "Do you really think we've any chance at a normal life together?" It was more of a statement than a question. Flipper didn't bother to reply. He clicked lightly, and held her again. But he looked straight ahead over her shoulder, and his eyes filled with doubt. To : Blabbery From : Phantom Subj : Not sex Mr. Pinrut rubbed furiously against the jagged edge of metal, trying his damnedest to get the stupid straight-jacket off, but to no avail. After working for at least five minutes, the only thing he had succeeded in doing is slightly dulling the metal edge, making it safer for anyone who happened to walk by, slip on a puddle of milk and impale themselves on it. Now they might not impale themselves quite so deeply. Pinrut grunted and groaned his way back onto his feet, and marched out of the ruin, trying his best to look dignified in the pretty flowered straightjacket. He never had worn a flower pattern before, and he was beginning to find that it worked together rather nicely with his nature loving, pacifist attitude. However, his silent musings were interupted as he suddenly remembered that he wasn't able to take over the whole universe and make every living being bow at his feet. "No sir!! Not this turnip!!! I don't have to take this kind of abuse!!" Pinrut spun left and went into the next closest doorway, looking for someone who would be able to aid him in his quest for universal supremecy, starting with getting this *##*$)! straight-jacket off, possibly followed by an hour of intense gardening to release his nerves. The room that he entered turned out to be a hospital room... Who would've thought? The bed closest to him was empty, but on the second bed somebody sat, facing the window away from him. Although the person was facing away from him, Pinrut concluded that it was a she... But before you get impressed by his amazing powers of deduction, try to remember what it was like when you wore a hospital gown. Somethings just can't be hidden, unless you have a staple gun to stable it shut in back. Pinrut called out from where he was standing. "Ummm... Excuse me, Miss? I don't suppose you could help me, could you?" The woman sat there still, unmoving, so he tried again. "Miss. My name is Pee-Wee Pinrut, and I plan on ruling the universe, it's just I can't get out of this damned get-up... Which is kinda important, you know. It's hard to blow up worlds, and point where to go, when your arms are tied up behind your back. So, could you help me?" Still the woman said nothing, so Pinrut, slightly miffed, walked around the bed to stand in front of her, planning to buffet her with torrents of verbal abuse, seeing as he couldn't really do anything else except jump on her toes. He was shocked, however, to find that the girl he was facing was beautiful... In fact... The most beautiful creature he had ever seen. She was magnificent!!! Unfortunately, she had a glazed expression on her face, and she seemed to have some sort of drooling problem... Nevertheless, Pinrut's heart pitter-pattered eratically in hiss chest. Feeling guilty for what he had almost done, he quickly shod off the straight-jacket and used it to dab the drool from her chin, marvelling at the beauty in those features. Standing back, he could've sworn that for just a second, a tiny gleam appeared in those deep, blue eyes. Sighing, taking her non-motion as rejection, Pee-Wee Pinrut put his straight-jacket back on, and went back out into the hospital, looking for someone who could help him take the infernal thing off. Maybe after that he could help her... To : Argh, Whoever From : Rancid Instigator Subj : Give me answers "Okay," muttered Steiner to nobody in particular, "I want some answers." Janne half-snarled, half-mumbled something incomprehensible and burrowed deeper into her blanket. "Why," asked Steiner addressing the console, "have I been up for fourty hours, pilotting this stinking ship to a place I find boring." Sequoia ground a sleep-misted eye with her fist and peered at him groggily. Janne snarled an invective that would be best left untyped and hauled the blanket over her head. Plopper squished out of the harness and plopped wearily around the cockpit. "Right. Never mind then," he grumbled. "Goodnight." He slumped forward, his head cracking against the console, and he slept. ------------------------ Kramodac entered a room and paused to catch his breath. Taking a quick, paranoid look around, he saw a weird-looking creature wearing a strait-jacket most uncomfortably. An idea popped into his head. "How much do you want for that jacket?" he wheezed. Pinrut paused for a moment, taken aback by the offer. "Lookit, think fast, there's a crazed chick out there who wants me to hit her," Kramodac gasped, holding his chest in an attempt to keep his bursting lungs inside his body. "Uhhh..." slurred Pinrut, "I dunno... a dead fish." Kramodac squinted his eyes in confusion. "How about five bucks?" "Okay!" Kramodac released Pinrut from the jacket. When he pulled out his wallet, he was coshed from behind by Pinrut's old, metallic arm, and fell to the ground. When he woke up, he found his wallet missing. He also found himself wearing a nice, neat, new jacket. ------------ Pinrut cackled to himself. He had an expired Visa card, $35 in Canadian funds, a driver's license, a little book with a lot of promising addresses in it, and two, err, french letters. He was well on his way to ruling the universe again. ------------ Steiner, of course, being sound asleep, failed to notice the highspeed collision that would have occured had Plopper not taken timely action. It jumped up onto the console, quickly wrapped three tentacles around the joystick, and dropped towards the floor, using its own inertia to control the ship. The asteroid whoosed by overhead, not more than a dozen meters away. "Lazy mortals," thought Plopper to itself, plopping on the steel bulkhead quite agitatedly. To : Alla Youse From : Rancid Instigator Subj : Next! On Geraldo... Steiner came to about sixteen hours later, with a crashing great headache and a stiff neck. Sequoia was still sprawled in her chair, as was Janne. Plopper was still plopping about nearby. "Uhh, Plopper?" asked Steiner. Plop, plop, plop. "How long have I been sleeping?" Plop, plop, plop. "Saaaay, what do you eat, anyway?" Plop, plop, SPLAT! The ship's autopilot applied the retrorockets suddenly, hurling Plopper up against the front viewport in a vicious collision, sounding for all the world like a piece of fresh liver landing on concrete after a merry jaunt down a fourty-storey fall. Plopper heaved himself, err, upright again, so that he looked like an upside-down octupus, and began plopping about drunkenly, obviously stunned. Steiner glanced out the viewport. Apparently, the ship had stopped to avoid a head-on collision with the japanese SOL satellite. "Home again," muttered Steiner. Sequoia stirred in her sleep and mumbled something incomprehensible. ------------------ He landed the ship near the forest ajoining the Oceanarium, and stepped out of the hatch. He was immediately besieged by reporters. "Excuse me, sir!" "What planet are you from?" "How was your trip?" "What makes you..." Steiner, quite taken aback, froze in the doorway. Sequoia, still yawning, stepped beside him, still wearing the lingerie she'd bought at InterHarrod's. The reporters, eyeing her curvaceous form, silenced immediately. She put a hand on his shoulder and wiped her eyes groggily. "I'm dreaming, right?" she asked him. "Uhh, yeah, I guesso..." he muttered, nearly stuttering. "Then let's give 'em a photo they'll really want," she replied sotto voce, and before he could do anything, she raised herself onto her toes and kissed him passionately. Steiner was too shocked to do anything other than reel backwards. The reports began shooting photos like mad, the flashes making soft 'pop' noises. Steiner fell off the boarding ramp, and took the four-foot fall on his back, landing in the soft loam with a thump. ---------------------- Front page on the Ottawa Sun: SPACE ALIEN LOVEAFFAIR! It has a photo of Steiner, a look of weird confusion and surprise, being kissed passionately. A second, smaller photo, also on the first page, shows him lying in the mud, completely surprised. To : Everyone From : Flipper Subj : time to move along "Boss?" "Boss? Hey, Boss! We're ready to go!" Flipper blinked, and slowly opened his eyes. It occurred to him that he ha fallen asleep. Carolina still slept, her head on his shoulder. "Huh?" asked Flipper. "The ship's fixed, and warmed up," replied Melissa. "We're ready to leave, before that other guy gets back." "Oh, right," replied Flipper, trying to clear the cobwebs from his mind. H gently woke Carolina, and they got up and went to the ship. "Right, uh, let's go, then," said Flipper trying to sound commanding and almost succeeding. Melissa sat down at the controls and expertly flicked The ship's mighty engines let out a powerful roar, and the viewscreen showed the hospital receeding into the distance, several dozen workmen smiling broadly and waving goodbye. Finally Melissa turned back to face Flipper and Carolina. "Well?" she asked. "Where to now, Boss?" Flipper smiled. "Earth," he stated. He didn't have to force the sound of command into the statement, to him there was nothing he wanted more. Melissa returned to the controls, and Carolina looked at Flipper. "I'm tired," she said. "Is there anywhere we can sleep?" Flipper nodded, and took her fin. They walked out of the control room together. Melissa turned and watched them go, a hint of annoyance on her face. Then she returned to piloting the massive ship. After several wrong turns, Flipper finally managed to find the living quarter's/guest rooms. Finding an unlabelled room, he pressed the door open button, and the door opened. (Imagine that!) Inside, a small group of women in various states of clothing were seated in a semi-circle around a large, muscular man, who was telling them about how he almost ruled the universe. "Pinrut?" asked Flipper. "How'd he get here?" Pinrut looked at Flipper and glared at the intrusion. One of the women got up and approached Flipper. She was in the almost-nude state of clothing, and Flipper found himself averting his gaze in an effort to be polite. "We found him when we were looking for that dolphin-woman of yours. There was no way we could leave such a man as HIM in that horrible place, so we brought him along!" She noticed Carolina. "Oh! Hi! They found you, did they? Did you ever pass the intro course?" Carolina blushed. "Not now," stated Flipper. He and Carolina turned to go, and the woman returned to Pinrut's story. They finally found another unoccupied room, and after listening to the door for a few seconds, went inside. The room was truly unoccupied, and Carolina laid down on the bed in exhaustion. Flipper glanced around nervously, also rather tired. Finally he sat down in a large chair and tried to make himself comfortable. Carolina opened her eyes and looked over at him from the huge bed. "You don't have to sleep there, you know," she sighed. "You can sleep with me if you want." Flipper stuttered something unintelligble, and nervously approached the bed. He laid down on it, and uttered a nervous "Thank you." Carolina sighed, and closed her eyes to go to sleep. To : No More Shirking My Duty Here From : Flipper Subj : Homecoming An intership intercom buzzed quietly, followed by Melissa's amplified voice. "We have landed on Earth. Prepare for guests. Boss, we're here!" Flipper sat up slowly and looked around, feeling much better for the sleep he'd had. He found himself up tight against Carolina, and moved away. Carolina stirred slightly, then woke up. "What's wrong?" she asked. "We're here," replied Flipper. "We're back home!" The two of them went to the bridge to see Melissa before disembarking. "I landed right next to the place you specified, boss," she said. "There was another ship on the other side surrounded with reporters, so I landed over here," she pointed at a map, "and I don't think they noticed us. But I think it would have been better publicity for the business if they did." "That's all right," replied Flipper. "I'm home, I can leave you now to do as you will." "What?" asked Melissa in disbelief. "What do you mean, leave us?" Flipper looked down slightly. "I just wanted to come back home. You're on your own again." Melissa looked somewhat upset. "You mean, all those times you punished me, you never really wanted to stay? It meant nothing?" Flipper blushed slightly, and shook his head. "That wasn't me," was all he could say. Melissa nodded slowly, and regained some of her composure. She removed the whip from the command seat and held it out to Flipper. "How about one, for old time's sake?" she asked. * * * Flipper and Carolina exitted the ship, and waved weakly at it. Some of the women waved back, others just watched. Then the hatch closed, and the ship lifted off, to get a better location to attract customers. Flipper looked over at the collection of structures which was his Oceanarium. He felt fond memories flooding back, and resisted the bad ones. Carolina tugged on him, and they walked towards it. Soon they reached the main building, and Flipper opened the door. He was surprised that he still had a key, let alone that it worked. Inside, things were much as he'd left them, although a bit dustier. He and Carolina headed for the living quarters. The office was still a ruined jungle, but the living part itself was ok. "How about a swim?" asked Flipper, activating the living room floor control. It'd been too long since he'd been in the water. To : Whom It May Not Concern From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : The Eye of The Storm The clear water was the perfect temperature. Quickly checking it for any misplaced statuary, Flipper slipped into it gratefully. He looked over to the side of the pool, where Carolina was also slipping into the warm water. He relaxed and drifted quietly along the surface, contemplating. It was, he decided, definitely time to do something about the office decor. *** Across the compound, a small army of reporters was setting up tents and broadcast vans. This was taking longer than it should have, as many of the technicians kept finding time (and somehow, money) to spend at the _other_ ship, which had landed not too far away. *** As the night deepened, the moonlight shimmered on the water in the Oceanarium's tanks, and a broad-shouldered, muscular person slipped from shadow to shadow silently, and not so silently as he slipped, cursing, in a wet patch. Nevertheless, the noise went unnoticed, masked by the cries and revelry sounding from over a nearby hill. To : All From : Phantom Subj : The Stuff that Dreams are Made of. The reporters sat huddled together in one of the larger tents, beginning to grow a bit bored with everything. Admittedly, it had been very exciting when the space aliens landed, especially when the one had given the other the deep kiss, complete with tongue. Yes sir, nothing could sell more papers than a good alien sex story. But now... Everything had slowed down. The two dolphin looking things had slipped off to some little out of the way pool, and the rest had just shut up. Nothing about coming to take over the world, nothing about killing all life because it was inferior, and absolutely nothing about the male aliens having their way with the female inhabitants of the planet, which had more than one female reporter just a little bit depressed about the whole state of things. The debates over what to do next rang on. One reporter suggested that since these aliens looked so human, maybe they were actually wearing disguises, and they should try to capture one and rip it's skin off to find out. Of course, this only led to a tent full of reporters sitting quietly looking around nervously at each other, wondering who would volunteer to capture one of the heavily armed aliens and rip their skin off. Seeing as media types tend to be intelligent, not to mention slightly chicken hearted, the silence stretched on for quite a long time, broken by the occasional cough and muffled voice saying "Bob'll do it." The silence became even silenter when the doorway to one of the ships opened and several female forms caming shooting out, squealing as they landed on the ground on their backs. Light gleamed through the doorway, outlining the female's nude figures in it's eerie glow, but before any of the media could react... Well... The males reacted, but not with their cameras... a huge figure stepped into the doorway blocking out all the light, casting a shadow over their naked bodies. As one, the reporters powered up their cameras and their microphones. This had story written all over it. To : All From : Phantom Subj : Vali...Vale...Vala... Whatever. Pinrut stood in the doorway, muscles straining, sweat streaming down his naked chest, whip held in hand. Below him were Buffy, Boopsie and Betsy, eagerly awaiting another well aimed stroke at various flshy portions of their anatomy. He pulled back his arm, ready to strike, and the three girls began to squeal in pleasure, imagining his firm blows raining down on them, but he was deterred from striking by the hundreds of microphones that were suddenly pressed in front of him. "Excuse me sir, are you going to whip these, poor helpless females?" "Well... Ummm... Yes." "I see. And it this a part of your plan to take over the world? Do you figure that you have the power, not to mention the right, to take over this world by first pushing around those that are helpless and innocent, and then moving on up, until you've controlled every human being on this Earth? Is that your plan? If so, how can you justify this?" Pinrut paused, still holding the whip limply in one hand. What the hell were these people talking about? They asked him to whip them, so he did. In fact, they were enjoying it. Of course they were. He glanced back to the reporters, taking his eyes of the three throbbing females below him. "Uhhh... Well, it's for the best you know. They like it." "Who likes it? Your leaders? Is that it? Do you have a whole fleet of battleships up in orbit, ready to blow this planet out of this solar system if we don't comply with your wishes?" "No, there aren't any battleships. I don't need battleships to help me with this." At this point he let the whip dangle down, delicately carressing Buffy's buffness with it's tip. "I can do this all on my own." The reporters scampered back several feet, "So, are you saying this is just a small example of your power, and you could, and will do more than you're doing right now?" Pinrut, now caught up in stories of glory and sensationalism, "Well sure, I've done hundreds like this at a time. It's nothing, really." Puffing up his chest, he reached out and stroked a female reporter's chin, causing her to faint. "See?" The reporters ran off to their broadcast trucks, convinced by what they had heard and seen. They were under attack from outer space, but by something so monstrous that it would seem impossible to stand against it. Meanwhile Pinrut went back into the ship, now followed by four women instead of three. To : Sundry From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : Things that go in the night. As a camp full of reporters quietly go berserk, the healines and announcements go out worldwide: Sadistic Aliens Invade the Earth! Alien Threatens to Conquer Planet Single-Handedly! Of course, these messages don't make the front page, that being taken up with the Elvis sighting in Iowa, but in the heart of the Pentagon, the situation is critical. *** A low ranking messenger streaks through the security check point into the situation room, papers fluttering in hand. "General Case! General Case, sir!" "What is it, Major?" replies General Case, a frown creasing his rugged features. Three feet of gold braid and medals, hanging precariously from a single pin on his uniform, jingle and rattle as he turns. "We have a crisis here." "Sattellite pictures from the Oceanarium! We have detailed photos of the ships!" replied the Major, flustered. With a tiny clatter, his name plate falls from his uniform, leaving his identity lost to history. "Excellent! Now we can scramble an assault team!" crowed General Case, a happy, predatory smile on his face! "The United States must be the _first_ to have a working starship!" He probably would have been less happy, had he known that similar conversations were even then occuring in China, Russia, Yugoslavia, Bolivia, Cuba, Uganda, Britain, France, (you get the picture.) He would have been even less happy to learn that, with the sattellites all closely observing the Oceanarium, nobody had spotted the Japanese quietly moving their SOL satellite over the increasingly popular marine park. To : All & From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : Where the comes in The night is all but over -- the first rays of sun twinkle on the Oceanarium's unoccupied water tanks. The only sounds outside are from the clattering of a hundred keyboards and teletypes as reporters announce the impending invasion. Inside the Oceanarium buildings, all is not quiet. A shuffling plop, plop sound echoes through the empty halls, as an octopus-like creature wanders the halls, looking for something interesting to do. Its attention is caught by a sunny glow emerging from behind a half-closed door. Behind the door is a dusty storage room, cardboard boxes of dried fish and toilet paper scattered randomly about the floor. In the middle of the room, three feet off the floor, a circular 'window' opens onto a scene of blue sky and strange, black grass. Suddenly the view is obscured! A human-sized figure dives through the window, crashing to the floor with a sticky, slimey thud. With a snap! the window is gone. The plopper peared anxiously at the newcomer. The newcomer stirred and raised six or seven greasy, claw-tipped tentacles, opening a cluster of eyes and peering about the room. The plopper trembled, for the first time in its life seeing something even more disgusting looking than itself. As the ugly thing raised itself onto a single, slug-like foot, it emitted a foul stench and bellowed in the plopper's general direction. With that, the plopper took off, its tentacles plopping along as fast as possible. The monstrous newcomer, giving a bellow of surprise, tried to give pursuit, not getting very far on its slug foot. Realizing this, it quickly changed its shape, becoming a very similar creature to the one rapidly departing. Then it too launched itself forward, and the halls echoed to the sound of double set of octopus arms slapping their way down the corridors. To : Me, 'cause I... From : Rancid Instigator Subj : ... said so. Janne spent the day huddled inside the scout. The ship was surrounded by a cordon of reporters, all of whom were looking for the ultimate scoop. Elsewhere, on another planet altogether, a man in his thirties wrestled, to no avail, with the strait-jacket he woke up in. His struggles soon ended, however, when a pair of nice, young men in clean white coats entered the room. "Get me OUT OF THIS!" bellowed Kramodac, wrestling keenly. They helped Kramodac to his feet, and before he could do anything, they shot him full of lithium. "Now be nice, Mister Pinrut, and we'll take you back to your special room," one said, taking Kramodac away. "But I'm not Pinrut..." murmured Kramodac, the drug making him feel at one with the universe, "I'm really Kramodac..." "Suuuuure you are," said the first, turning to roll his eyes at the other man. They threw him into his room and slammed the door shut behind him, leaving him to lie on the floor in an uncomfortable heap. "How'd ya know it was Pinrut?" asked the second man. "Said so on the tag on his jacket, din' it?" replied the first. "It's the only way you can keep those guys with MPD straight. Poor devil, he's even a paranoid schizophrenic and megalomanic to boot." They shook their heads in dismay, and drank coffee until they glowed in the dark. ------------ Night fell on the Oceanarium. Janne, Steiner and Sequoia dressed entirely in black, or at least as much black as they could wear. Steiner had only a pair of ragged trousers an a t-shirt with "Artextrodinaire" on the back, but it sufficed. The women had more than their share of clothing, bought with the proceeds from the sale of the Naughty Nymph. "Got the plan right?" asked Steiner for the millionth time. In perfect synchronization, their snazzy new electronic watches beeped, including the pair that Plopper now wore. The canopy slid open with a whir, and Steiner, dripping with his ludicrous collection of weapons, dropped to the ground. "Go away, or I'll hurt you," he growled, levelling his GUN at the collection of reporters collected around the ship. Several newscameras flicked on, and Steiner, being somewhat of a ham at heart, smiled broadly for the camera, his teeth gleaming, before opening fire. BRRRAAAAAAAAACK! spat the gun, as it pumped out rubber rounds at a mindboggingly fast rate, emptying the huge clip in less than five seconds. "Ow!" thought a journalist for TIME, as a round caught her square in the forehead, "hey, isn't that the GUN from Mexico?" Before she could be certain, the stunning effects of the round took over, and she passed out. Also unnoticed by all was the soft *PHUK* noise the ejection seats made, mainly because a large GUN was on full auto without even the common decency of a silencer. Janne and Plopper were catapulted through the air, both doing a neat double-forward roll, and landed well beyond the ring of unconscious reporters. Janne sprinted for the forest, Plopper made for the building. Sequoia, knives in hand, merely laughed at the mass carnage. She replaced her knives, dug out Steiner's flamberge, and dropped to the ground. "What say you and I go to a bar somewhere and get a drink?" she asked. Steiner, feeling even more manly than usual (firing large, phallic symbol-like weaponry will do that) chuckled evilly, slung the weapon on his back, and nodded. "Put this on before you go," she said with a smile, handing him the flamberge. With a grunt that would have done a barbarian proud, he complied, and they both stalked off to the town's bar strip. ---------------- Two hours later, Plopper was unnerved to find the ugliest creature it ever saw coming through some manner of portal. In pure instinct, it fled momentarily, then caught itself. "I am a god, after all," it thought. It turned around to face its pursuit, which most curiously, was an exact replica of Plopper. Not even bothering to figure this one out, Plopper merely began to plop up and down. Unable to resist, Plopper's imitator began plopping up and down as well, in perfect synchronization. Plopper began to plop up and down faster, and the doppelganger followed suit. WORSHIP ME commanded Plopper, as it plopped on the ground in a veritable frenzy. To : Hmmmm? Huh? From : Flipper Subj : Sorry, must've dozed off. Flipper awoke to a bevy of faint, and unusual sounds coming from the Oceanarium. His first instinct was to ignore them, hoping they'd go away. After all, he and Carolina were finally back in the Oceanarium, where they would finally live out peaceful, and happy lives together. Reassured, he snuggled up against her still-sleeping form, and allowed the gentle rocking motion of the moving water lull him back to sleep. THUD! Flipper opened his eyes again, as the sound of something large and unpleasant landed hit the floor, seemingly inside the building. Faint plopping sounds emitted from the same direction. >buddabuddabuddabuddabuddabuddabudda!< Flipper's eyes widened farther at the nearby sound of automatic gunfire, easily heard with his sensitive hearing. Carolina began to stir. "What's going on?" she asked. Flipper buried his head in his flukes in dismay. "It's starting again," he replied. * * * Flipper watched as the last of the water drained from his living room, and the floor returned to it's flush position. Carolina watched nervously, and curiously, as Flipper hadn't said anything of what he intended to do. Finally, he turned to her. "Wait here," he said, then turned and left the living quarters. * * * Flipper left his office, glancing only momentarily at the two Ploppers performing frenzied bouncing in the middle of the hall. He nodded, as he he'd expected something like that, then turned away from them and left the building. He began to cross the massive grounds which made up the Oceanarium, passing the drained tanks which once held his attractions. Maybe were spray-painted with graffitti, apparently from the young skateboarders who seemed to like using the empty tanks. Flipper made a mental note to do something about them. He moved on, glancing in the direction from which he had heard the machine-gun fire, however there seemed to be nothing to see, save a small spaceship near the trees. Flipper shrugged. He paused for a moment as he reached one tank in particular, remembering the killer whales it once held. They had frightened him, but he didn't hate them, and their fate pained him. He gazed through the observation window, but of course saw nothing but an empty tank. He straightened up, and continued. He was not at his destination yet. * * * Carolina paced nervously, hearing sounds that she didn't like at the edge of her hearing. She wondered where Flipper had gone, and why, and when he would get back. To : Me... From : Rancid Instigator Subj : yet again, 'cause I hate sequels and nobody else wants 'em. Kramodac found himself in a large, dank, concrete room, strapped to a large, wooden chair that had an eerie resemblance to an electric chair. A speaker system hidden in the walls crackled into life with a sharp retort of static. "Now," said a voice, masked by fancy electronics, "what is your name?" "Kramodac!" he replied. In another room, a large, burly man sat. He wore the same fresh, white suit that the other employees of the sanitarium wore, but had red racing stripes and "Doktor Demento" emblazoned on it. In front of him was a speaker, a microphone on a stand, and a TV camera. Centered in the image was a single chair, currently occupied with a slim, thurty-year-old man. Sitting by his elbow was a piece of paper, bearing a single name: Pinrut. "You'll have to do better than that," replied Doktor Demento, flipping up a safety switch off to the side. "KRAMODAC!" screamed Kramodac, working himself into a frenzy. "I'm sorry, Mr. Pinrut, that's not correct." The Doktor reached out and pressed a huge, evil-looking red button. Millions of volts arced into the chair and into Kramodac's form, causing him to shudder in agony. After a brief while, the good Doktor spoke again, and again asked Kramodac who he was. "Okay! I'm Pinrut!" screamed Kramodac, "but only on weekends and civic holidays!" The Doktor locked the shock button down, and sat down to read a copy of Hustler. ------------------------------ Steiner and Sequoia made their way down a deserted sidestreet, skirting their way across town, avoiding most of the bars of repute. As they walked past a particularily dingy building, the front door crashed open, and a large, burly man, his face badly pummelled, flew out and landed in a heap near their feet. Another man stood in the doorway and brushed his hands together in contempt. From inside could be heard the noises of much drinking, fighting, and revelry. Sequoia and Steiner looked at each other, nodded assent, and smiled. Before Steiner could even hit the front door, Sequoia had the fallen man's wallet. ------------------------------- After six hours of continuous electrical shocks, Kramodac's mind finally snapped. His eyes glowed from within with the blue energy of electricity, and small arcs jumped from between his fingers. "Who are you?" asked Doktor Demento. A long pause ensued, while Kramodac's face twisted into a smile of unheard of evil. "I", he said, with a low growl of a voice, "am Pinrut." "What do you want to do most right now?" asked the Doktor. "I want to kill," replied Kramodac, his eyes narrowing to thin, electric-blue slits. Demento flipped the auto release switch on the Happy Therapy Chair. Snatching up his clipboard, he ticked the box marked "Cured". Observing Kramodac closely with the monitor, he hastily locked the doors to his control room. Kramodac, with a negligent wave of his hand, blasted the locks to the outside hall with a jolt of electricity, and headed towards liberty. To : And From From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : My tentacles are getting sore. Even shapechanging beings get tired. Not having the godlike stamina to stand and plop up and down all day, and not having the interest, either, it watched, intrigued, as a more intelligent looking being opened a door and walked by as it plopped in counterpoint to its unspeaking partner. Seeking some decent conversation to familiarize itself with this dimension, it turned itself into a reasonable facsimile of Flipper and walked after him, leaving the Plopper to squish by himself, alone. -------------------- Ignoring Flipper's intstruction to stay in the living quarters, Carolina stepped into the office and brushed a few leaves aside to peer out the window. Though the dawn had started awhile ago, one VERY bright star could be seen, moving slowly above the Oceanarium. It was odd, but so were a lot of things Carolina had seen recently, so she ignored it. What did catch her attention was the sound of a dolphin walking away from the office door. Why was Flipper still here? She opened the door and peered out as the dolphin stepped around the corner. Some kind of octopus thing was sitting, exhausted, on the floor. It was rather ugly and she shut the office door quickly, before it saw her. ---------------------- "Tango Foxtrot Alpha, this is Green Leader Six" said the commando, into a small radio. "In position at tank five" The soldier was an elite, red (or is it green?) beret sort of guy, his face heavily blacked out despite the bright morning sun. He shifted a nasty looking rifle onto his shoulder, checked his knives, grenades, truncheons and other weapons, and stepped out from behind the empty whale tank. He was prepared for anything, but of course, nothing was there. He quickly shuffled off towards the ship, briefly seeing one of his comrades doing likewise. ------------------------ In a small, dark room, somewhere in orbit, a Japanese SOL technician watched an energy meter as it slowly climbed from WARM to COOK on a tactical display. At the far end of the meter was a single word (in Japanese), best translated as "OBLITERATE". A large cross hair on the tactical display centred on the Oceanarium. The technicians finger hovered patiently over a big red button. To : Hey! Leave My Oceanarium Alone From : Flipper Subj : Let's see.... Flipper rounded yet another corner, only to stop short as he spotted a young boy gazing absently into an empty tank. "Uh, kid," called Flipper. "We're closed. We sorta have been for a long time. In case you didn't notice, we don't have any more dolphins." "Mr. Flipper!" yelled the kid, whirling around with an expectant look. "Uh, Bud?" asked Flipper, as recognition slowly dawned. * * * After sending Bud back to the main building to keep Carolina company, Flipper continued on his way, finally reaching the place he'd set out for. He unlocked a door, and descended down some stairs into a dark, dusty room. A sign hung over the stairwell. Through the dust, it could be read to say "Undersea Lounge". * * * Bud raced back towards the main building, suddenly full of enthusiasm. Mr. Flipper had closed the Oceanarium and left ages ago, but Bud still snuck through a hole in the fence to wander around, and remember the fun he'd had. But now Mr. Flipper was back, and the fun was sure to return, too! Maybe he'd get some new dolphins, and reopen the park. Bud was certainly ready to help as much as his 12 year old body could. He raced around a corner, only to collide with a greyish form, and hit the ground. He looked up at what he ran into. "Mr. Flipper? How'd you get in front of me?" * * * Flipper mumbled to himself, as he rummaged through the bar in the disused lounge. It was still stocked, and still never used. He didn't care if trouble was going to start up again. He was determined to show Carolina that they could live out the life they wanted, by leaving the outside world to tend to itself. Finally he drew two bottles, and placed them on the bar. One was a special bottle of wine he'd purchased to celebrate the opening of his Oceanarium, and the recognition of his dream. He snorted in disgusted amusement as he remembered that. Now he planned to enjoy a special drink, and a quiet moment with Carolina. The other was a bottle of strong vodka, to get good and drunk on when the trouble he was having premonitions of did begin to happen all around him. Whistling happily at his plans, he took the bottle and began to head back to the main building. * * * Still nervous, Carolina began to fill up the living room with warm water again. She thought she'd feel more relaxed in the soothing water, until Flipper returned from wherever he'd gone. * * * Plopper, for the first time ever, was not plopping. What he was doing was staring blankly ahead in amazement. A creature had broken free of his worship? What could it mean? To : The Crowd From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : Leave what alone? The creature that wasn't Flipper looked down at the small being. He (for the shapechanger was a he, sort of) was glad he had come to this dimension. In only a couple of hours he had met three (presumably) intelligent beings. He helped the small being to its feet, saying, in squeaky dolphin, "KKkk.." Bud looked at him in confusion. "Mr. Flipper, sir?" Not Flipper looked back expectantly. "Are you all right?" continued Bud, noticing for the first time that the dolphin in front of him didn't look _exactly_ like Flipper, just very similar. "Mr. Flipper, sir?" repeated the creature back. "Kk squealll.." The languages were hard. One seemed instinctive, but still very difficult to learn. Perhaps this small being would help him. Not Flipper decided to stay in his current form for now -- things were confused enough. * * * Above the Oceanarium, the Japanese SOL station quietly hummed to itself. Onboard, a power level meter continued to rise, growing from COOK to BROIL and beginning to approach the DEEP FAT FRY setting. The large red button sat alone in the dark however -- the technician was getting some lunch. * * * On the ground, the reporters busiliy pretended not to notice the black clad commandos infiltrating every nook and cranny, a task which was becoming uneasily difficult as squads of different nationalities began to circle each other warily. They found it even more difficult to ignore when the fighting began to break out between the rival groups, and machine guns and explosions began to wrack the camp. To : Flipper's Bliss From : Flipper Subj : ssilB s'reppilF Flipper returned to the main building, deliberatly trying to ignore the rustlings in the bushes around him, and the occasional darkly-clad man tresspassing on his property. He and Carolina would have their time. * * * Flipper presented the bottle of fine wine to Carolina, and they poured each other a glass. Carolina smiled, and Flipper smiled back, and they both drank. It was the perfect beginning to a romantic evening, and soon the occasional gunfire sounds were lost, as they stared deeply into each other's eyes. Only an hour later the wine was gone. Carolina was eying Flipper out of the corners of her eyes, and smiling seductively. Flipper, his alcohol tolerance perhaps a little lower than Carolina's, reached down, pulled out the vodka, and took a swig before unsteadily offering the bottle to Carolina. Carolina took the bottle, and took a small sip, swishing it gently with her tongue. She handed the bottle back to Flipper with a wink. Flipper responded by taking another swig from the bottle, then plopping down into a sitting position against a wall. He held the bottle between his fins, and watched Carolina wonderously, almost as if he'd never seen her before. Carolina decided the time for subtle hints were long past. To : Further Developments From : Flipper Subj : Ya snooze, she looze. Carolina sighed, frustrated, and removed the floating vodka bottle from the living room pool. She gazed at Flipper, snoring quietly at the surface of the water. He'd fallen asleep almost as soon as she'd led him into the water. It wasn't overly surprising, since he'd managed to almost finish the bottle. She sighed again, swam over, and snuggled up next to him. Then she closed her eyes and slept. * * * Bud stared curiously at the dolphin before him. It looked like Mr. Flipper, yet, something was different. He examined it carefully. That was it, the eyes. The eyes had a different spark, they drew his attention and concentration. He stared at the eyes, and felt as if his mind was floating a thousand miles away. * * * The small creature was trapped now, it's mind linked to the morphing creature's own. From Bud's mind it drew knowledge, it learned what Bud knew, and what Bud expected. Finally it knew enough to play it's role, and it ended to hypnotic link. * * * Bud shook his head suddenly, clearing the mental cobwebs. "Whoa," he thought. "What happened?" "Yes, Bud," said Not Flipper. "I think it's time to get things moving again, I must re-open the Oceanarium." "You're gonna get more dolphins?" asked Bud eagerly, forgetting his mental lapse. "Yes," replied Not-Flipper. "Yes, it is time for many changes." Bud cheered, as a satisfied smirk formed on the face of Not-Flipper. It would play it's part, until opportunity arose for furtherance of it's designs. * * * In a completely unrelated event, a large meteorite en route to the earth's atmosphere slammed into the Sol satelite, destroying both the satelite and the meteor, and producing a lovely meteor shower (which nobody saw because it was daytime.) The technician in charge was, months later, found guilty of neglecting his duties by going for a donut, and fined several hundred dollars, in addition to having to pay for the satelite out of his lunch money. To : All From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : SOL sattellite eliminated by author, no reason given. Not-Flipper walked slowly through the Oceanarium, examining everything. Now and then black-clad reinforcements would creap past him, detected only by his superb hearing. Not-Flipper looked around carefully -- a little bit away from the camp a small war was progressing, and having seen conflict in a variety of worlds, Not-Flipper decided to stay out of it. One of the tanks was just being refilled, and Not-Flipper decided to test the swimming abilities of his new form. He was pleasantly surprised at its grace and power. It was wonderful! He hadn't had this much fun since the time he'd... he'd... he couldn't remember. It was too many centuries ago. Not-Flipper relaxed and playfully somersaulted about the tank, to the delighted surprise of Bud, who almost never saw Mr. Flipper do anything so playful. Bud, hidden nearby, decided not to tell the dolphin he'd seen him -- it was impolite to spy after, after all. Bud turned off and wandered away regretfully. ********** Down at the former media camp, a number of griþòzzzzled looking sanitation workers in yellow jumpsuits gathered up the bodies. The fighting had pretty much died out, and the various commando units had either withdrawn or been anhilated outright. A few scantily clad female technicians, looking out from the busier ship, had noticed the commotion, but, as it didn't seem to be affecting business, soon ceased to worry about it. Periodically, the sounds of a cracking whip and laughter could be heard, but for the most part, these playful sounds were drowned out by the crackle of flames and the whine of sirens from the nearby town, where several seedy looking bars were rapidly burning to the ground. *********** Above the Oceanarium, the only remainder of the SOL satellite, a large metal plate reading "Made In Japan", slowly rotated in the glare of the sun. *********** Bud, walking through the Oceanariums dusty, empty corridors, was startled and surprised to see an exhausted looking octopus slowly Plop its way towards the exit, in the general direction of the smaller ship. He sincerely hoped it would not return. Maybe once all this alien stuff had settled down, Mr. Flipper would set up the Oceanarium again. To : I Am Author #2 (i Guess) From : Flipper Subj : and no reason was required. Flipper and Carolina continued to sleep peacefully, blissfully unaware of the goings-ons around them, exactly as Flipper had wanted. * * * Meanwhile, Not Flipper paused to rest from it's exurberent behavior. It carefully considered the information it had read from the young earth-boy's mind, pondering the characters it might run across. The Flipper form was fine for most instances, and the female-Carolina form would be useful should it confront the original Flipper. Bud was also an option. A look of concern crossed Not Flipper's face. The Steiner character seemed unstable, perhaps dangerous, at least in the Earth-boy's opinion. He might be detrimental to the cause. He must be neutralized. The Flipper form was not suitable for this. Although it enjoyed the swimming, it searched for an image to metamorphasize into. Soon it found it. Steiner would never suspect the bumbling mechanoid Mr. Pinrut. Until it was too late. Not Flipper exitted the water, and quickly shifted it's form, becoming Not Pinrut, replete with freshly shined metal body, flowing black cloak, and fresh turnip head. Morphing a finger into a brown crayon, Not Pinrut drew a friendly, engaging smile on the turnip, and set out in search of Steiner. * * * This author has lost track of the other characters. It's expected another author will answer "yes" to the "Enter a message?" prompt. To : Oops From : Rancid Instigator Subj : I didn't mean to enter "YES" at the "Enter a Message?" prompt. Poo. Steiner adeptly nudged a person out of the way, and plunked himself on a barstool. With a casual wave, he directed Sequoia to a neighbouring seat. The bar was loud, smoky, and generally disgusting, with fungoid growths and odours permeating that of unwashed bodies. Sequoia felt at home, quite obviously, and relaxed a little. Behind the bar, made of knife-scarred wood, stood a huge, burly bartender, with a patch over one eye and a motley collection of tatoos on his arms. He stood taller than Steiner, which was an impressive feat in itself. The bartender clumped over to Steiner, and passed an appreciative eye over Sequoia. She, by pure instinct, moved a little closer to Steiner. "What can I getcha," growled the bartender. Steiner took the opportunity to lean over to Sequoia. "I've always wanted to do this," he whispered. "Yeah," he said, obviously overacting. "I'll have a sarsaparilla." The music, the fighting, and the conversations in the bar stopped cold. Everyone turned to look at Steiner in shock. "Excuse me?" asked the bartender. "Yeah!" Steiner replied belligerantly, "I said I'll have a sarsaparilla!" He stood up, kicked over his bar stool, and limbered his GUN. "Anyone got a problem with that?!" he screamed at the crowd. Several members of the crowd shook their heads no, and most of them made sure their hands were in sight. Before anyone could react, he scooped Sequoia in his arms and gave her a hard kiss on the mouth. She collapsed in pure shock. "Just checking," he said with a smile, reslinging his gun on his shoulder. Sequoia began the long process of picking herself up off the floor. ---------------------------- Janne had snuck into the forest, and spent a long time dodging soldiers and clouting the occasional one upside the head with the flat of her blade. Eventually, she found her way deeper into the forest, and there, she found the Naughty Nymph, the doors locked. She strode purposefully up to the door and began beating on it with the pommel of her sword, leaving dents parallel to those of the fuzzy ape. Eventually, the door slid open, and a female face poked out. "Oh shit," said the woman, "it's you." Janne unleashed a vicious smile. "Where's your boss?" she asked. "I'm in the marrying mood right about now." She pulled out a whetstone and began honing the edges of her blade. To : Me From : Rancid Instigator Subj : While I'm at it... Plopper, meanwhile, was cruising about the Oceanarium, looking for signs of anything unusual. There was lots of dust, old, empty tanks, a few skateboarders, and a shapeshifter, but nothing out of the ordinary. Satisfied, Plopper began bouncing off the walls, following its own, secret agenda. Nearby, Flipper, in an alcoholic stupor, heard a rhythmic, moist, thudding noise which sounded exceedingly familiar. Several mental demons bestirred themselves for a moment, then subsided. ------------------------------------- Off on another planet altogether, Kramodac was blazing. He cut a hole through the wall of his room and marched outside to freedom. Following his inherent electromagnetic sense, he found an old iron scrapyard. With deft jolts of electricity, he began welding himself a spaceship, based on the most recent one he'd seen... Several days elapsed before the work was finally finished. There, made out of old, rusty iron I-beams, was a replica of the Naught Nymph... to a degree. The colour was obviously wrong, and here and there, meter-long hunks of metal protruded where none should. With little jolts of electricity shooting from his fingers, Kramodac climbed into his newly built ship, used static-cling to stick himself to a wall, and piloted his crate out to space. To : Anyone Impatient Enough. From : Phantom Subj : Spaghetti-Human Style The girl stared at Janne with an astonished expression... Marry? Marry the boss? She didn't think he'd like to hear that. Nevertheless, Suzie (which was her name, coincentally) politely asked the huge muscle-bound blonde to wait at the door (which she double checked the locks on) and turned her bodacious body back towards the 'games' room. Walking down the hallways of the ship, her gracefully swaying hips gave no insight into the jumble of emotions that were wracking her on the inside. Could this girl actually take their little Pinny-winny from them? Would they have to live the rest of their lives knowing that their bottoms could only be spanked by someone who was only second-rate? Could they ever eat turnip again without breaking down and crying...? Her thoughts reeling, Suzie turned around the last bend and opened the door on the right, the one marked by signs saying "Danger: Physics Experiments in Progress". Opening the door, a bath of warm air washed around her, carrying on it's currents many girlish squeals of excitement and pleasure... Suzie sighed. Why did she have to be on duty right now. As her eyes adjusted to the lighting, she took in the massive pile of writhing naked bodies in the centre of the room. She began licking her lips as she observed the sweat soaked bodies moving in rhytmic orgasmic patterns, obviously centreing their passions on the object lying underneath them. God how she wished she wasn't on duty right now. A deep male voice boomed out in the room, sending another wave of passion through her, nearly shattering her self-control. "Left foot on blue!" The conglomeration of nubile women squealed in delight as they began shifting themselves, and Suzie sighed again. Carefully skirting around the group playing twister, she walked up to Pinrut, who was calling out the moves on the other side of room. "Excuse me, your Royal Mighty Steed of Lust, there's somebody here to see you." Pinrut barely noticed Suzie, finding it hard to pry his eyes from the twister game, but he did have enough awareness to ask who it was. When Suzie told him, she was amazed to see that Pinrut, the man beyond any man they had ever met, actually seemed to quake in fear. Dropping the game, Pinrut jumped to his feet. "Umm, I've got to go to the washroom, I'll be back in about two or three years. Bye!" To : Those Who Wait From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : Fine. Go ahead and murder him, then. Not-Pinrut walked down the bar strip, having jogged over quickly from the Oceanarium. There were many clues that Steiner and his female companion had been here recently. Such as the several burned out bars. Finding a likely looking tavern, he stepped in, discovering it to be suspiciously quiet. The patrons were all tough, streetwise folks, but had already been threatened by a gun wielding maniac. A shambling turnip headed robot was the last straw, and they all departed hastily. The bar became quiet, nearly silent, with only the wailing of a heavy guitar from an ancient, scratch speaker. Not-Pinrut walked past it and punched it out with his metal fist, shattering it into splinters of wood and plastic. The barman took one look at Not-Pinrut and dived for cover. Casually, Steiner and Sequoia turned around to see who approached. Their eyes widened. The GUN's enormous muzzle raised, and knives appeared magically in Sequoia's nimble hands. The air filled with an electric tension. * * * * * * * * While pleasant games of Hide and Seek were often played aboard the Naughty Nymph, a game of a different sort was now in progress. Up and down the steel halls clattered a pair of metallic feet, desperately trying to avoid the muscular amazon who pursued with relentless determination. Fortunately, robots have more endurance than even the strongest of amazons, and the quarry was able to stay ahead, for now. But the Naughty Nymph, while a large ship, could still be searched by someone persistent enough. To : Yeah, Whoever From : Rancid Instigator Subj : You know what I mean. Steiner glared suspiciously at the bartender, who, when faced by a GUN and a pair of throwing knives, both wielded by a pair of maniacally glaring psychopaths, wet his pants. "Who," growled Steiner, the muscles in his trigger finger visibly tightening, "put goddam celery stalks in my drink?" In the far corner of the bar, someone dropped a needle with an audible tinkle. ------------------------------------------- "COWARD!" she screamed, and spat in disgust. Tiring of pursuining yet another combatant throughout the massive ship, she retraced her way back to the exit. Janne paused momentarily to glare at the occasional customer who stuck his head out the door, and on more than one occasion, delivered a swift punch to a wall. A trail of dents marked her passing. ------------------------------------------ Plopper grew tired of wandering the halls of the Oceanarium. Aimlessly bouncing its way through the front door, it found its way into the city proper. By morning, the city's downtown core woke up to the sounds of a rhythmic nature. It sounded as if someone was dropping hunks of fresh liver from a great height at precise intervals. Plop(opop), plop(opop), plop(opop) echoed throughout the downtown core as Plopper plopped its way through the business section, its plops echoing off the tall buildings. Business, that day, did not go over particularily well. Plopper had found a city corner to plop up and down, rapidly, in one place, and anyone who passed within sight of the beast heard its command echoing through his or her mind: WORSHIP ME. Plopper had found a hat, and businessmen, wearing fine suits, and secretaries, in skirts and high heels, would bounce up and down in front of Plopper, in perfect synchronization. Plopper's bouncings had been properly calibrated to coax the change from people's pockets. The change would spill out, and almost invariably, it would find its way into Plopper's newfound hat. In less than an hour, Plopper's hat was filled to the brim with pounds of change. Plopper was the god of panhandlers. To : All From : Flipper Subj : uh-uh.... not yet Not Pinrut paused, and watched Steiner and Sequoia threaten the bartender. This was neither the time, nor the place. Drawing attention to itself here would not further it's cause. It casually exitted the bar. * * * Slowly, Flipper became aware of a weighty presence leaning against him, pressing him against a smooth, hard surface. Eventually he concluded that Carolina was probably leaning against him, and he was against a wall. He opened his eyes to verify his theory. Searing pain shot through his head as the light struck his retinas, and burned down his optic nerves to his brain. He winced, and closed his eyes tightly. He again opened his eyes, more slowly this time, and this time the light caused only a dull throbbing pain. He confirmed his theory, and carefully moved to free himself without waking Carolina. He proceeded to a washroom, where he took several aspirin for his headache, then quietly left the building. * * * Finally Flipper reached his destination, his "quiet place". A small, wooded cove on the beach of the ocean near his oceanarium. He liked to come here to be alone, and think. Perhaps some day, he thought, he might share it with Carolina. But for now, he just wanted to relax, and think about his future. * * * Not Pinrut returned to the Oceanarium, and quickly morphed back into Not Flipper. The young one had expected Flipper to reopen the Oceanarium. It would be good, it thought, to begin doing so, so as to avoid suspicion. It entered the office and picked up the phone, to begin placing orders on new marine stock. * * * Peewee Pinrut paused, panting, and checked a computer locator map, which conveniently showed Janne leaving the ship. Straightening up, and aquiring a self-satisfied smirk, he nodded to himself, and headed back to resume his business. To : All From : Tuxedo Dolphin Subj : Bud is happy... confusion reigns. As Not-Flipper watched, the last of the dolphins was off loaded. The service he had called promised speedy delivery (30 minutes or they're free!) and he reminded himself quickly of their phone number, 1-800-DOL-PHIN, the cetacean delivery service. The unhappy captives complained, and Not-Flipper was surprised at their apparent lack of intelligence. From what he'd seen so far, the 'real' Flipper was far brighter than his kinfolk. Well, it would make his job harder, but he'd just have to persevere. He had come a long way for this, he rationalized to himself. Although he didn't want to admit it, he'd fled his last dimension of residence to escape certain death -- those in power often objected to his 'teachings.' Nevertheless, he expected little trouble here. It seemed to be in a state of perfect anarchy. * * * Bud had been staring, entranced, at a reddish chunk of metal lying at the bottom of an empty tank. Twisted and burned, it was still barely possible to make out some sort of Japanese writing on it. It had apparently been flung here from a great distance, as it seemed to have done some damage to the tank. His musing was cut short by the sound of cargo trucks unloading. Almost afraid to hope for it, Bud rushed over to see if Mr. Flipper had brought in new dolphins. * * * Nothing particularly interesting happened, or so thought those observing the outside of the Naughty Nymph. It didn't even rock back and forth, though not because of a lack of effort on the part of the inhabitants. =================================================== harmlesslion.com - Not for Commercial Use